How to Get Past the Cleaning Blocks
In this post I went over a few reasons why we might have mental blocks when it comes to cleaning. Now that we figured out why, it’s time to figure out HOW to get past them!
I can promise you that the mental hurdle of getting past your blocks is the hardest part. The actual cleaning? Not actually that hard. (Trust me, I had a hoarding problem. The mental blocks are e v e r y t h i n g). Granted, cleaning is physically hard, but your cleaning blocks make it so much worse! So you just end up both physically and mentally exhausted. If you struggle with anxiety you know what I mean. When you have anxiety, you could physically do nothing all day long and still be absolutely drained by the day’s end. And is it just me or is mental exhaustion waaay worse than physical exhaustion? Because at least physical exhaustion comes with a sense of accomplishment.
So what can we do about it? First, we begin to take charge of our mindset and break down our cleaning blocks brick by brick. I’ll cover a few with the space I have here, BUUUUT if you’re looking for a deeper dive into tackling your mindset, I have a whole Mindset Reset unit in the free inclusive homemaking Facebook group I just launched!
Take it one day at a time- You might have heard this one so many times that the words have lost meaning for you. But I need you to really listen here because this is the key. Change will not happen overnight. Change comes one day at a time in little ways that add up to big amounts. I believe in overnight miracles, but the important part of our healing is the journey. I’m sorry to say it, but your house becoming magically clean overnight is not the answer. The answer is your healing. Did you know that over 70% of lottery winners go bankrupt within five years? 70%!!! Just like magically receiving an enormous amount of money won’t solve the root of someone’s money problems, having a magical cleaning fairy clean your house won’t solve the struggles you’re having with it now. Mindset affects every single thing we do- yes, even minutia such as cleaning! When you take it one day at a time, you allow yourself to heal in a non-linear way. Some days might feel like you’ve taken 1 step forward then 2 steps back. But by taking it one day at a time, you can relax and trust that this is part of the process.
Practice gratitude - It’s really hard to be negative when you’re living in gratitude. Conversely, it’s really hard to be positive when you’re living in discontentment. If you can think of just three things -any three things!- to be grateful for every day, do it. You’ll feel generally happier which will help you begin to see things in a new way. My spouse likes to say, “Not wanting something is as good as having it.” Which I think is Socrates, although I’m not sure about the context he meant when he wrote it. But we like to adapt it to our life for when the discontentment begins to creep in. Gratitude is the ultimate mindset changer!
Lower your expectations - If you are just starting out or just beginning your mindset journey, do NOT compare yourself to someone else! Actually, even if you’re a seasoned homemaker you should still never do this. The only person you need to compare yourself to is yourself. Social media is a highlight reel. If you’re following homemakers who are making it seem easy, then they’re either outright lying or you’re making some big assumptions. Either way, move the expectations down. You are a human being and houses are hard to keep clean. It takes daily effort that gets undone practically as quickly as you do it. It can be maddening thinking you need to have it all done at the same time. Unless you are obscenely rich or don’t actually live in your house, there is no way everything in your house will be clean at the same time. When I clean my bathrooms on Wednesdays, I know I’m going to walk out and see a dirty kitchen staring me in the face. Yes it’s annoying, but it’s my real life. Once I learned to accept lowered expectations as a part of reality, it made it much easier to free myself from the hamster wheel of comparison.
Think positive thoughts (but don’t fall prey to toxic positivity) - This one is a challenging one! The line between choosing positivity and slipping into toxic positivity can be blurry at times. When you’re in the middle of it, it can be hard to see the shadow side creeping in. Here’s an example of the difference between healthy mindset change and toxic positivity: Choosing positivity in a healthy way sounds like, “Ugh this thing really sucks. I’m feeling really negative feelings right now. These feelings are showing me something important about myself or about a situation. I can let myself feel these negative feelings right now and then choose to release them and decide to focus on the positive.” Toxic positivity sounds like smushing down your true feelings or silencing them because you don’t want to put negative energy out there. Toxic positivity comes from a place of fear, a positive mindset comes from a place of power.
Use positive ‘I Am’ affirmations every day, even if you feel silly - This one is a game changer but not everyone does it! It can feel silly to say something like, “I am a worthy and wonderful homemaker.” or “My house is becoming the haven of my dreams more and more every day!” when you look around and see exactly the opposite of that. But the words we tell ourselves matter! If you tell yourself that you’ll never amount to anything and that your home will always be trashy, then that will be true. But if you tell yourself that ‘I am worthy’ and ‘I am a good homemaker’ then that will become your truth. It won’t magically change your home for you, but it will begin the process of changing YOU. It’s almost impossible to change a habit when you keep expecting yourself to fail!
If you’d like a more in-depth dive into mindset work or just want to be a part of our community, join my free Inclusive Humans & Confident Homemakers group on Facebook!